Conflict is part of life, and that includes our work life. It is natural and it will happen. We are not “wrong” for finding ourselves

at odds with ourselves and/or others from time to time. Some people become so uncomfortable (and clueless) that they won’t admit they find themselves in conflict. Not accepting conflict will make it harder for them, and the people around them, to solve the problems creating the conflict. Conflict is difficult and will never be truly comfortable. But it is also an opportunity to change the status quo.

CONFLICT RESOLUTION LEVELS

Conflicts can be solved on various levels. First, we can let it go for now. If we gain more insight later into the matter at hand, we can change our minds, and sometimes we can just move on altogether and leave the conflict behind. What we first believed to be a conflict no longer is.

When we do believe something needs to be worked on to be solved, we don’t always need deep, thoughtful consideration. For example, when you and I disagree over what to have for dinner tonight, and we both love pasta and rice, we don’t have to have a hard time solving the matter. You can have your way tonight, and tomorrow I will (or the other way around).

But sometimes we disagree on a deeper level. Using the same example about dinner options, this time I might say neither option works for me, while you are stuck on these options and will accept no others. Since we are committed to have dinner together, we have to solve the issue on a deeper level.

Many people solve issues on a “this or that” level, but solutions are often nonbinary and complicated. Solutions may include exploring concepts such as: What are our needs? What are our true wishes, concerns, and core values? What matters most to you? What matters most to me? Where can we find each other—what is our common ground?